X:The Rise and Fall of an Asylum Star

I have a song stuck in my head. Not the annoying pop song from cardio class at the Y that usually plants itself for days. Nope, I haven't heard this particular song in years. It is from "My Fair Lady", when Eliza Doolittle (Audrey Hepburn) gets home after the ball and is too excited to go to bed. Soaring from her recent magical experience, she can only sing to express how exquisite her evening was, and she sings, "I Could Have Danced All Night." This is the song I have stuck in my head, for I have recently had the time of my life and cannot make myself go to bed...

nor can I keep from

singing.

Recently I produced and performed in a show in the Orlando Fringe Festival, X: The Rise and Fall of an Asylum Star. The show was written by Jill Dowse, and is the true story of Augustine, a young woman diagnosed with a vague feminine condition called Hysteria.

 I am very proud of the work, and had a blast performing at the festival. Fringe was twelve days of unadulterated, uncensored, fabulous forms of self expression- and I didn't want it to end. The best part was seeing the shows. I felt such community with my audience and the other artists. I felt like we belonged to each other. I had never been a part of something like it, at least not of this scale, and now I can't stop dreaming of how to get in on that kind of fun again. I plan to submit my video to the New Orleans Fringe Festival, so hopefully X will Rise again in November. Also, my big, far- away goal is to tour the Canadian Fringe Circuit next summer. I have a feeling that dream will come true.

Meanwhile, I move to the next moment.

I have never blogged before, but why would I? I have never considered myself "bloggable." But lately, I have the inclination to be more present in public. I want to be with community. The act of sharing an idea wants presence and exactitude. Basically, I am forcing myself to be more specific, for someone might be watching. As a performer, I know the quality of my focus is sharper when I am being watched in a performance rather than in a rehearsal. It shouldn't be this way, really, but it is. I feel the weight of their gaze, their expectation. I feel accountable. Maybe this is like that.